Grey But Great News Day.

The clouds may be over, the rain maybe be pouring and the water maybe dripping  in our spare room - but despite all of this- it is still a Great News Day!

I have come to the conclusion that life works in mysterious ways. The world is small and indeed wonderful, and everything happens for a reason.

I have always been an advocate for the saying, 

"Everything will be alright in the end, and if it's not alright, it's not the end".

It is something that I have always tried to have in the back of my mind when times are tough and life gives you tiny, hard lemons.

With the world being small, I heard an amazing story from our cake lady back in the UK, who met a couple whose daughter lives in Oz but is having a celebration in Kent after having the official ceremony in Australia earlier this year.

She mentioned that she was making a cake for a woman in the opposite situation-living in Oz but getting married in Kent. 

The couple mentioned my name laughing as the cliche question of 'Do you know so and so in Australia?' comes to mind.

Our cake lady looked at them and said 'yes' and she's marrying an Aussie-and mentioned my fiancé.

It turns out that our cake lady was speaking to an old school friends parents whom we reconnected with at my friends wedding in Canberra in February! Small and wonderful world indeed.

This brought a smile to my face as I realised the beautiful uncertainty of life-of which I was always unsure that uncertainty was a positive thing.

After a period of recent negative uncertainty, anxiety and concern, I have landed a temporary contract job for the next few months doing Graphic Design and Marketing for a disability NFP.

This definitely helps add to my newly found optimism.

In addition to this, I was also announced as the winner of a 6 week nutritional overhaul program as a part of my boot camp and wedding/fitness preparations!

I have won a running singlet (vest top), a healthy cooking book and 4 weeks of Bootcamp for free!

Plus, the long awaited Chocorn has hit the Woolies shelves! (For my UK readers it was a winning product from a reality cooking show called Recipe to Riches).

It looks to be three amazing flavours of cholesterol dipped popcorn. Yum!

So tonight I shall celebrate with my love all these successes (and work off the Chocorn at Bootcamp tomorrow!) and see that sometimes the stars do align in the most mysterious ways to reward a testing situation with the best possible outcome. 

Much loves xoxo

The Wedding 'Mare.

As I sit here munching on my hot buttery raisin toast and earl grey tea, I realise that the 5 month mark has slipped by me without even realising. By 3 days to be exact.

It is this fact and the fact that I didn't realise, that makes me realise that we are on that downward roller-coaster ride to the wedding day. What also solidified this realisation was the start of the wedding nightmares.

This started happening last week - when my subliminal mind must have been trying to tell me that the countdown had begun - as I awoke in a panic realising that I had just lived out my wedding day without any head wear or ceremony decorations. To top it all off, no one ate the cake. The panic set in.

I am reluctant to subscribe to the constant countdown to the wedding day, as this can instil worry, panic, anxiety, pressure, nightmares or all of the above. The pressure that we all put ourselves under for the sake of ensuring it is the most photogenic event ever, to top cousin Bethal's $100k wedding on Hamilton Island with dolphins delivering the rings to the shore*, is getting out of hand.

However, although I am trying to be the 'cool, calm and collected' bride that I would like to be, I am not immune to the wedding nightmares.

The lists of tasks not yet completed, the decisions not yet made, the millions of ideas to sift through and discuss of yet another Pinterest board will definitely reek havoc on your sleep content.

The fact that most wedding guests don't take home their 'gift' or can't recall the flower arrangements on the tables does help to refocus our energies on areas that will actually enhance the day without spending hours or money worrying about the finest details - that will be forgotten in an instant.

I have it on good authority, and from my own experience, that guests always remember the dress, the food, the music selection, that funny moment the flower-girl farts mid-ceremony ** and whether there is a free bar or not. Sometimes the wedding cake is forgotten and left uneaten! As a lover of cake insert - Shock! Horror! here.

What I am constantly trying to remember is perspective. The reason why we are getting married and the journey that it has taken to get us both here.

Having met my gorgeous fiancé in South America, reconnecting in Australia, kidnapping him to Asia, meeting the family back home in England and then jetting off to live in Australia, we realised very early on in our relationship what we wanted our end goal to be. There were so many chances to back out and it would have been easier to do so, but we both know that we would have missed out on an incredible lifetime of happiness.

I think it is a telling sign that the hardest part of a relationship in our situation, is the situation itself, as being together is the easiest part.

So with that in mind it is now 4 months and 27 days until W-Day and I should get back to that list. Just for the record, the chocolate cake will be cut and it will be eaten in multiple slices (and that's just for me!) as nothing says "I love you" more than fabulous cake.

I am sure there will be many more wedding nightmares (like knocking over the wedding cake just like I did at my Mum and Step-dads wedding***) but if that happens, just wake up and make another hot buttery slice of raisin toast with a cup of earl grey tea - but this time, for two.


Much love xoxo


*disclaimer - I do not have any cousins, definitely none called Bethal and this is not a suggestion on how to utilise dolphins in your own wedding.

**disclaimer -This did actually happen at a friends wedding. And it was pretty funny.

***disclaimer -This also happened. Luckily the solid royal icing saved it.


Ps - Thank you for all your kind words of support for my last blog post. It is greatly appreciated and your insight has given me great inspiration for your appreciation.

Career Crack

I recently saw this post on Facebook and it instantly alleviated some of my current worries.

5 months out from the wedding day and 5 ¾ months from my 28^th birthday, I’d have thought I had it all figured out. Learning from my mistakes in my teen years and “discovering myself” in my twenties. 30 is on the horizon along with becoming a wife, buying a house, owning a dog and rabbit (they will be friends) and hopefully having a family of my own.

Alas. As I evaluate my life on a Tuesday afternoon (I wrote this yesterday) on a rare, sunny autumn day in Melbourne, I realise that maybe I’m not quite there. Newly unemployed after escaping the clutches of yet another workplace destined to send me into an early grave. And I had subscribed t it along with everyone else.

Now that its only 4 months till we leave for the wedding and requiring 6 weeks off, it seems unlikely that a permanent job is on the immediate horizon. However, I’m tempted to believe that this could be a blessing in disguise.

We spend so long in the workplace with the retirement age seaming increasingly out of reach. Factor in university, some travel and a few years of family time and you are still looking at around 40 years working 38 hour weeks – unless you are fortunate enough not to have to.

Now this is obviously less than previous generations, however with the world being so career focussed, I am tempted to believe that with higher competition, expectations , working hours and responsibilities, that today’s working world has hit a peak in stressful working conditions. And it is not working out. With more people now than ever suffering from work-related stress issues including insomnia/sleep disorders, this is not a sustainable strategic plan for long-term growth.

Going back say 12 years when I was a kid, I used to think that the monotony of a 9-5 job was s routine, so typical, aka so conventional. I was extremely career focussed – set on getting my qualifications so I could go to uni to “better myself” and to enjoy the privilege of a “better life” with “higher pay” as it was sold to us prospective undergrads.

Little did I know that a ‘career job’ didn’t fit into this mould of a regular 9-5 job as I was avoiding, but in the worst way possible. Hello late nights, working from home, working weekends and whatever else to ‘prove myself’ in my career, my dedication to each and every role I took.

I could never predict how an industry that you give so much to can take even more back until it is taking things like your health and social life until you feel you have nothing left to give. Or even willingly give.

They say that your 20s is a period of uncertainty, self-discovery and getting to grips with your path in life. Well, I have definitely seen the uncertainty in the last few weeks – if not for many years. Being surprisingly unemployed after giving everything plus more until I ended up  with a sleep disorder psychologist. He is helping but miraculously my sleeping is much better without the anxiety of work.

I have learnt my boundaries in the workplace what I am prepared to give and compromise and what I am not.  Maybe this is what sealed the unemployment deal.

But most importantly I do feel that despite this hurdle I am on a healthier path in life. I have recognised that I have a self-sacrificing schema (Google it if it resonates with you – it could really help) which means I am destined to a decline in my own personal heath in order to benefit someone else. This has drawn me to the conclusion that the fundraising industry can never be an entirely good thing for me.

So, a time to reflect, back-track and to see what I really can do and achieve without all the monkeys, gorillas and other zoo animals on my back. I’d like to go back to my creative routes where I am truer to myself and I can dedicate my time to my health, my life, my future and our future life together.

In the meantime, maybe I should really go back to my routes and get a paper round.

Other updates:

The plant situation is going really well with a large number of reddening chillies and the mint going pretty crazy. The wedding prep is also going well – I think – with invitations to be posted in the next few weeks.  I am attempting to catch up on all the things that you never have time to do as well as getting a new job and wedding stuff.

I shall try to keep my updates more regular – it is one of my resolutions – so keep prodding me ok?

Much love xx